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Whatever happens, it's going to be beautiful

Updated: Jul 6, 2023

As it turns out, running a business is complicated. Someone should have said something.

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I started this company in 2019, a few months before the world shut down. I did my first runway show at New York fashion week in February of 2020, and everything was on the up! I had a career in public health previous to my adventure into fashion and when the pandemic started, I was convinced everything would be fine in "two weeks." Turns out, I wasn't great at public health.

I shut down the business after the pandemic hit hard. Orders were returned, wholesale dried up and everyone invested in sweatpants. I don't sell sweatpants (yet), so I shuttered. I had discovered I was pregnant the day before the show in New York (casual, not stressful, totally cool), so some time off made sense. I had a baby in October of 2020, and he is cool as hell.

Then it got tricky. I had a really serious case of postpartum OCD. (Look it up! Its so fun.) A few months after I had my kid, I couldn't sleep, couldn't really make sense of things, and had a hard time taking care of him. I also had a proper team of doctors trying to figure out how to fix my brain. With the help of those doctors, therapists, an amazing support group full of moms going through the same thing, and modern medicine, I'm good now. It wasn't fun, I don't recommend it, zero stars.

From that dark time, came the ice dyes. The ice dyes were a project to get my sad self outside and get some sunlight. In a time when I felt, truly, like I had no control, I found it wildly helpful to make a huge mess, and let go of the need for control. Ice dyeing is fun, you should come over! I will show you how to do it.

To ice dye: You basically pack ice on top of each piece of clothing, sprinkle powdered dye on top of the ice, and let it melt. You just walk away and let the dye travel with the water from the melting ice. Wash, dry, done. There are a number of metaphors in there, but I will spare you the obvious translation. What was important to me in that time, and now, is that whatever happens, it will not be what you expect, and it will be, without fail, beautiful.

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